来自 | 撰写| 11月19日
Chocolate Chip Cookies
An elderly man was at home, dying in bed. He smelled the aroma of his favourite chocolate chip cookies baking. He wanted one last cookie before he died. He fell out of bed, crawled to the landing, rolled down the stairs, and crawled into the

来自 | 撰写| 11月19日
A guy was dating a girl named Lorraine. He knew that Lorraine was the ONE. She had all the qualities that he wanted in a woman. She was smart, funny, and beautiful. Then one day in the video store, he met a girl named Clearly. Now Clearly was beautiful, funny, smart, and knew all t

来自 | 撰写| 11月21日
A woman went into a funeral home to make arrangements for her husband's funeral. She told the director that she wanted her husband to be buried in a dark blue suit. He asked, "Wouldn't it just be easier to bury him in the black suit that he's wearing?"
"No," she in

来自 | 撰写| 11月21日
A young man was walking through a super market to pick up
a few things when he noticed an old lady following him.
"Pardon me," she said. "I'm sorry if my staring at you
has made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look
just like my son,

来自 | 撰写| 11月24日
Employee: The stress my boss puts me under is killing me. I have migraines(偏头疼）, my blood pressure is going through the roof, I can't sleep at night, I just found out that I have an ulcer（溃疡）, and as long as I stay in this job, the only question is whether I'll have a st

来自 | 撰写| 11月28日
A Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. "Now, children," said she , "has anyone of you ever make someone else glad?"
"Please, teacher,"said a small boy,"I've make someone glad yesterday."
"Well

来自 | 撰写| 11月28日
A little boy says to his mother, "Mom, I'll be good for a dollar"
The motherreplies, "I shouldn't have to pay you to be good, you should be good all thetime"
The little boy says, "OK Mom, I'll be good for 50 cents."
The mother sa

来自 | 撰写| 12月1日
Bob: "So, you say that you won the conversion with your wife yesterday."
Joe: "Yes, she came crawling on her hands and knees."
Bob: "Really? What did she say?"
Joe: "Come out from under the bed, you coward

来自 | 撰写| 12月1日
A man and a woman walk into a very posh Rodeo Drive store. "Show the lady your finest mink!" the fellow exclaims.
So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gorgeous full-length coat. As the lady tries it on, the owner discreet

来自 | 撰写| 12月3日
1.You are not a superman.
你不是超人。
2. If it＇s stupid but works, it isn＇t stupid.
如果一个蠢方法有效,那它就不是蠢方法。
3.Don＇t look conspicuous －－it draws fire.（This is why aircraft carriers are called″Bomb Mag nets″.）
不要太显眼,因为那会引人攻击（这就是航母被称为“炸弹磁铁”的原因）。
4.Never share a fo

来自 | 撰写| 12月8日
A blonde was driving back from the mall when there was a terrible hail storm. Huge hail stones the size of golf balls pelted her car leaving it full of dents(凹, 凹痕). She drove to the body shop (车身修理厂)and asked what she should do.
The body man explained what needed t

来自 | 撰写| 12月8日
One night, a husband and wife were having a conversation over dinner:
WOMAN: What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?
MAN: Definitely not!
WOMAN: Why not - don't you like being married?
MAN: Of cour

来自 | 撰写| 12月12日
George W.Bush visits an elementary school and the 4th grade class is in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in a discussion of the word″tragedy″. So GeorgeW.asks the class for an example o

来自 | 撰写| 12月17日
CROW perishing with thirst saw a pitcher, and hoping to find water, flew to it with delight.
When he reached it, he discovered to his grief that it contained so little water that he could not possibly get at it. He tried everything he could think of to reach the

Why did it make you late
Mike was late for school. He said to his teacher, Mr. Black,
“Excuse me for my coming late, sir. I watched a football match in my dream.”
“Why did it make you late?” inqui